What is Leadership?

By Grace Hui for Incentre

In all aspects of life, leadership is very important. While we all acknowledge that good leadership is crucial in order for any given venture or project to succeed, what is less clear is what constitutes leadership in the first place. 

What is even more confusing is what makes an effective female leader? 

We can assume that most people understand that the leader is the person in charge but at the same time, many are also not able to given a definitive definition of what the term “good leadership” actually means. 

Most also fail realise that we are all leaders of our own lives.

Looking at some examples from history ranging from Alexander the Great to Ghandi, what is obvious is that a leader is an individual who can unite people in a common mission. Both of these men, from different backgrounds, divergent timelines and with distinct goals were able to bring people together, thereby reducing separation. History has proven time and time again that endevours succeed and endure when the people involved are committed to a cause and the leader plays a vital role in holding all of this together. 

To be a leader is to serve. It is to be the last person to sleep and the first person to show up. It is the person who will make the difficult decisions because it is for the highest good. It is the person who will instil rules for the safety of all and also the person to exercise mercy.

The shadow of leadership has come to dominate leadership in some circles where people confuse leadership for fear or where leadership is confused by division or control.

In reality however, ruling through fear and division or in tyranny will never bring lasting results. In fact, it will destroy the cause. The person who acts in this manner destroys the cause. 

Leadership in its purest form is a leader who acts by example, who unifies and who eradicates separation. It is also a leader who is authentic and not a hypocrite.

This applies in our individual lives too. Do we have separations within the self? Are we living in a way that does not gel with who we really are? Are we the leaders in our own lives or are we merely following someone else’s?

Leadership by example

As the saying goes, “do as I do, not as I say”. After the end of Apartite in South Africa, Nelson Mandela could have easily instituted punitive measures against the white South Africans. He had been incarcerated for 27 years and he could have taken revenge. Yet, he did not. He chose to forgive. 

He could have also told the people to forgive while privately pursuing revenge - in other words, a hypocrite. But he did not. In fact, he was the first to forgive, publicly saying that if he did not forgive, he would still be in prison.

In so doing, the country was able to move forward without bloodshed because his countrymen followed his example. He was also able to earn the respect of the white South Africans who may have supported apartite. He was able to be the beacon of unity in a divided country because he led by example. 

Authenticity in Leadership

Sometimes, people who have been put in leadership positions might feel that they have to be someone that they are not in order to lead. This inauthenticity will lead to separation within the self. It is unsustainable and cracks will soon show. Those we are purporting to lead will be able to sense that we are not being true to ourselves and will as a result, not respect our leadership.

Being authentic doesn’t mean that you have to tell everyone everything at all times. It simply means that one should not act in a manner that is contrary to his or her true self. 

Let’s take Ghandhi as an example. He was against any form of violence and strongly advocated for peaceful means to fulfil his goals. It was something he lived by and something that governed his day to day life. It wasn’t just something he said to appease the British authorities at that time. 

He lived it. 

Imagine if he only paid lip service to the concept of peace while simultaneously undertaking acts of violence. Would this not have caused confusion to his followers and caused chaos? Would chaos not have railroaded his mission of independence?

In the end, Gandhi succeeded in his mission of independence for India because he was true to himself. He earned the respect of the people he was leading and also the British rulers of the day because of his commitment to non-violence.

Leadership by Inclusion and not fear

Many times, people rebel against the leader because they feel excluded from the cause. While fear of reprisals can keep rebellion initially, it will not hold long term. Countless studies have demonstrated that you get the best out of people when they are willingly a part of the cause. There is separation in fear and as we established above, separation causes disunity and harms the cause.

The leader must also be able to set out a clear path for progression so that any one who seeks to progress knows what he or she must do to get there. The leader does not selfishly hog resources to prevent others from progressing. 

Using a corporate example. Worker A does not want to remain at the same entry level post forever. Worker A wants to upskill, get increments and promotions. If Worker A is unable to see a career path under the leadership of the company he or she works for, it is par for the course that Worker A will leave the company. And if Worker A is extremely competent, wouldn’t that ultimately be a loss to the leader and the company in question?

The good leader is not an insecure one.

On the flip side, there should also be a space for good workers who choose to remain in their given positions. For example, if Worker A was happy in his or her current role and is good at it and chooses to remain in it, Worker A should not be forced out simply for not having “ambition” so to speak. 

An effective leader recognises that people might be different but are still committed to the cause and unifies them without fear.

A Leader takes responsibility

As Spider man once said: “With great power, comes great responsibility”. A leader must know himself or herself well enough to differentiate between the ego and the commitment to the cause. The line can often be blurred and many a leader has fallen down this slippery slope where they have convinced themselves that a particular decision is really for the good of all when in reality it was always about themselves. 

This is why a leader has first got to know thyself. 

In reality aren’t we all leaders? The leaders of our own life? But how can we truly take ownership for the direction of our lives if we do not invest time and efforts into truly knowing ourselves?

This is why many ancient traditions practice initiations to imbue the individual with the tools to truly know themselves.

In the tradition of the Modern Mystery School, the path begins with a Life Activation to bring us back to our divine blue print. This is then followed by an Empower Thyself class and initiation to empower us on the journey of knowing thyself.

Female Leadership

In our modern day and age, there seems to be a quest for women to be equal to men. While men and women are equally important, it is crucial to point out that this does not mean that women are men and that the only way for a woman to be an effective leader is to act like a man. If a woman had to behave like a man just to lead, it would be a leadership that is inauthentic. 

How can a female leader act by example if the example she is setting is that a woman cannot be a leader? 

A woman should be able to succeed on her own terms as a woman, not by pretending that she is a man.

Some might say that women have no choice because that is how society is geared. Yet, how can anything change if we buy into what we do not believe in?

The narrative that women have to behave like men in order to lead is not an immutable reality. It is a creation of society and just like how it was created by society, we can also collectively “uncreate” it. We just need to take a step back and explore the concepts for what they are.

Women can be just as empowered by men. While they may seem softer on the outside, they are just as powerful on the inside, so why not show that power as a fully empowered female as opposed to a woman trying to be a man?

There is space for all of us if we start with trying to truly understand ourselves. What is it about us that is not actually us but just a mask that we put on because we have been conditioned to believe we have to?

See the difference? 

Man hating has also become the shadow of female leadership. As mentioned above, leadership is about bringing people together for all their strengths and weaknesses. When there is hate, there can be no unity. So a leadership stance that promotes hate (whether consciously or unconsciously) against half the world is never going to be truly successful.

In a nutshell

A leader is not born. A leader is made through sheer hard work. Not just hard work on his or her craft but hard work on truly knowing thyself. Seeing reality for what it is and accepting it. Without accepting the realities of our own hypocrisies or the lies we tell ourselves, how can we change? 

Hermetically speaking, there is a concept of “As above so below, from within so without”. Your inner world reflects your outer world.

Are you really not gaining the success you want because society is conspiring against you? Or is there some truth within yourself that you are unwilling to face?

Tough question yes but one that will yield great results if we were truly willing to face ourselves.

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If you feel called to walk the path, you may start your first step with a simple Life Activation. Contact us at contact@incentrelondon.com to learn more.