By Grace Hui for Incentre
Resistance is something that we are all familiar with. From going to the gym to sorting out our wardrobes, we all go through a wide spectrum of feelings ranging from inertia to laziness which in turn lead to all manner of internal excuses and justifications we make in order not to perform the tasks that we know deep down are actually for our own benefit in the long run.
A yoga instructor once famously told her class that getting to the class was the hard part. Once you are actually there, it is really not that bad. In fact, once you get over the hurdle of showing up, the rest is easy. In other words, it is the action of getting there that is difficult. Once you push through the obstacle of getting there, you actually enjoy what it is that you are there for and most will agree that they are glad they showed up after the fact.
It is therefore not the beneficial task at hand that is the problem. Rather, it is our own resistance to something that would actually have a positive impact in our lives that is the issue.
Using an example from physical exercise. Personal trainers often utilise something called “resistance training” in order for us to become fitter and stronger. Resistance training is any exercise that causes the muscles to contract against an external resistance with the expectation of increases in strength, power, hypertrophy, and/or endurance. Therein lies the principle that in order to improve, we have to overcome the resistance. This same principle applies in all areas of personal growth.
There is also the concept of “breaking through the pain barrier”. In sport, athletes are lauded for going past the point where pain reaches a peak and begins to diminish. In other words, facing up and surmounting that which causes us pain will eventually cause the pain to fade and result in heightened performance.
In my personal journey with my own emotional growth, spiritual development, and overall expansion, I have faced this “resistance” many times.
Why do we resist when we know deep down that showing up will be the best thing for us?
Mind chatter versus the wisdom of our higher self
Oftentimes, it is our mind that makes up the excuses that stops us from showing up from the stuff that is actually good for us.
Going back to the gym example. We would have booked that HIIT training class at the gym. It would have energised us and set us up for the day. It would have helped with our fitness and health and the list of potential benefits go on. However, when the alarm clock goes off, our mind would tell us that it is too cold, or that we can do it tomorrow instead or that we really need to eat a Big Mac instead.
Do we then allow the mind to win over all the physical, emotional and overall wellness benefits that we would have derived from simply showing up in the class? Sometimes we do and invariably, we will regret that further down the line.
This happens when we allow the mind to be the director of everything when in reality, the mind is but a part of the whole as opposed to the sum total of the whole.
If we were truly in balance and connected with our own higher wisdom, we could recognise this for what it is - mind chatter - the stories we tell ourselves - with no bearing on the actual truth. And this my friends, is exactly where resistance lives! The mind!
While the mind and logical deductions are very important aspects of our discernment, there is a difference between mind chatter and wisdom.
Wisdom
There are many ways to define wisdom but one of the ways wisdom can be understood is the ability to discern what works for our own highest good. To exercise wisdom in accordance with our higher mind, we need to truly know ourselves and to become experts on ourselves. While this process may not be easy and it certainly does not happen overnight, it is most definitely rewarding.
If we truly know ourselves, we would be very aware of the difference between resistance to what is actually good for us and resistance to genuine danger. With that knowledge, we would be able to push through the drama of mind chatter and show up for ourselves in ways that benefit us.
There is a certain programming in society that we have all experienced. This programming may make us more partial to the “mind” over the “emotional” or the “spiritual” aspects of ourselves. However, for us to be genuinely wise and discerning, all of these aspects have to work in concert and are equally important. There is also a difference between genuine mental clarity and the drama of mind chatter, which if we were not in full balance and understanding, we would be unable to differentiate! Mind chatter, or noise, which does not come from our higher selves could be misguidedly confused for logic!
The first step to combating resistance is to recognise it for what it is.
Setting Boundaries with your Resistance
This is not always easy. At times, we may process and deduce situations from the lens of past traumas which colours our judgement. For us to be able to see situations clearly for what it is and make a decision that best suits us, we need to be empowered to recognise and work through traumas so as to be released from them. For this to happen, we need to know what our divine purpose is. Everyone has a different purpose and we need to be connected to our higher selves in order to work that out for ourselves.
In the tradition of the ancient mystery schools, there is a well trodden path to gain mastery over the self which begins with a “Life Activation”.
The Life Activation awakens the dormant parts of ourselves that blocks our connection with our divine blueprints. Once we are able to access our divine blueprints, making clear decisions in line with our highest goods becomes almost second nature.
After the Life Activation, there is a class and initiation called "Empower Thyself" in the Modern Mystery School. In this class and initiation, we are handed down the tools of how to work with our own energy fields to truly understand and comprehend the full extent of our ability to create what we want in our lives in alignment with our divine purposes without the drama of external influences, the negative ego or the self sabotage that comes from unprocessed trauma.
In a time honoured tradition that has spanned for thousands of years, these tools are handed down from teacher to student in an unbroken chain. Much more light is anchored into your structure to illuminate your shadows so that you can heal them. This is so important in helping us to recognise our mind chatter for what it really is.
As part of the “Empower Thyself” program, you will be handed down the tools to connect with your higher self via the “sanctuary meditation” - a space that allows you to connect with the pure wisdom of your higher self without the pollution of your subjective fears or judgements.
Once you recognise that mind chatter, you can set a boundary with it and use the tools handed down to tackle that resistance which will in turn lead to self improvement.
By wielding the tools handed down by "Empower thyself", you will daily face yourself in love and honesty. And by showing up for yourself in this way, you heal not only yourself but all the relationships around you.
Knowing Thyself
A big part about empowering ourselves to live in accordance with who we really are is also to have the courage to truly know ourselves. In this way, we can recognise our unique gifts and are able to use them for service without any interference from our negative egos. We are also clearly able to see the areas which we need to work through in order to become better versions of ourselves - not in a punitive and judgemental manner but from a place of genuine self love.
As a second step initiation to “Empower Thyself” is “Know Thyself”. The “Know Thyself” class and initiation gives us greater access to our creative, intuitive, and meditative abilities, thereby tapping into the rich fabric of inner knowledge and wisdom.
With these added tools and resources, we are better equipped to serve ourselves and tackle resistance to our personal development. We can set a boundary with our resistance and refuse to give in to it!
There is a difference between a “thought” and reality. To quote Ipsissimus Dave Lanyon of the Modern Mystery School, “reality is that which is not malleable by thought and cannot be replaced. If I can change something with a thought, it was never real. In other words, if I can just sort of think differently and that changes my reality, then you are not really dealing with reality, You were always dealing with an illusion.”
Where do you think “resistance” sits?
After all, if we truly know ourselves, we would know what would be in our highest long term good and in turn, we would overcome inertia to show up for ourselves even if it meant temporary discomfort or short term unpleasantness.
As the saying goes - “no pain no gain”!
In a nutshell
In order to avoid self-sabotage, we first have to recognise the difference between the temporary fear of discomfort from something that is genuinely bad for us. To be able to differentiate between the two, we need to cut through the density of mind chatter to access our higher minds. This can only be done if we are truly empowered to really know ourselves.
It is only with overcoming resistance and loving ourselves enough to show up that we can grow and soar to greater heights. It is only with breaking through the pain barrier can we emerge from our shadows to be the best versions of ourselves.
